Return of the Recluse

After 3 years, I decided to finally go out again on my own. I chose to go to Philly. After my experience, I understand why I am a recluse......

Top Ten Highlights of the Night.....

1. Accidentally walking into an Asian massage parlor.
2. Having a guy come up to me and tell me I have an EVIL look on my face.
3. Hearing a guy actual say, "You'll never guess who I friend listed on Myspace.......Kevin Federline!" then high-five his friends.
4. Hearing the pick up line, "You know those things will kill you!" to which the smoking man replied, "So what, fuck it!"
5. Learning that I am horrible as a follower on the dance floor.
6. Learning that I don't know any of the new country line dances.
7. Having half a drink of vodka and seven up and being knocked on my ass by it
8. Listening to guys have a contest of when they last smoked weed.
9. Ending up being the hand towel attendant in the bathroom.
10. Realizing that sign language is a useful tool at gay bars and nightclubs.